My husband is a beautiful human being.
He is kind, incredibly smart, funny, interesting, sexy, intense and intruiging.
He also has Aspergers Syndrome.
That's made life....... interesting, to say the least.
He can be very hard to talk to. He doesn't understand facial expressions, subliminal cues or body language. He can be focused on one special subject to the exclusion of all else. He is hopeless in social situations. He is insanely literal in his thinking - subtlety and double entendre are completely lost on him. He generally thinks only of himself and his world-view.
He has to. Its all he can do.
And I love him and wouldn't change him for the world.
Now, I never imagined that I would be one day married to someone with this condition, although in retrospect, I believe my ex - Brett - also suffered from Aspergers. While we were growing up, though, there was no such thing as "Asperger's syndrome. There were only the "weird kids".
Well, I married a "weird kid", and as I say - I wouldn't trade him for the world.
Life's not easy, as anyone married to an "Aspie" (or AS) will tell you. We NT's (neuro-typicals) operate in a far more complicated and messy world than an Aspie can deal with. Allowances must be made.
For example - my husband doesn't think often of my needs. Aspies don't. I understand that.
But tonight he came home with some allergy medication that I had wanted to ask him to purchase, yet decided not to as I could last until I could get to the pharmacy myself.
But my husband thought of it, and came home with the medication, saying "Oh well, you ALWAYS need this stuff."
I was touched and felt cared for (an unusual situation in an NT-AS relationship), but his thoughtfulness and kindness, in light of his disorder was so touching and lovely, I really needed to write.
If you think you might be in a relationship with an "Aspie", please feel free to email me, or to check out Apsergers resources in your area.
Its not easy, by any means, being married to an AS - but they are lovable, delightful people and can often surprise you......
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
you know.... you coulf think of it as speaking a new emotional language ......and thank God that he has offered you this wonderful opportunity to learn in such a different challenging way.....
and by the way ...with time.... and familiarity, you will be quite surprised how much he will think of you ...... the more time that passes..... the more you are apart of each other...which means that your needs become one.... :)
Lil Sparrow
ps my word verification was srtigia... so close to strega ... :)
Post a Comment